This quote came across my desk today:
“Narcissists can be so lovely, charming, friendly, and downright accommodating with everyone else but so moody, dark, nasty and even cruel to you.”
Have you worked for a narcissist?
Have you ever been in a relationship with a narcissist?
The dictionary defines narcissism:
Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others
Signs and symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder:
A person with narcissistic personality disorder:
- Has a grandiose sense of self importance
- Lives in a fantasy world that supports their delusions of grandeur
- Needs constant praise and admiration
- Has a huge sense of entitlement
- Exploits others without guilt or shame
- Frequently demeans, intimidates, bullies, or belittles others
Other undesirable traits of a narcissist:
Shaming and blaming:
Narcissists use shaming and blaming to exert control. The narcissist achieves an elevated position of power by:
- Being rude
- Putting people down
- Hiding behind cruel jokes
When a victim protests, the narcissist shames them into silence, sometimes saying that the victim is “too sensitive”.
By blaming others, the narcissist has no responsibility for their own lives and their own actions.
A narcissist monopolises conversations:
This is one of the most obvious signs of a narcissist. Narcissists talk over or interrupt other people during conversations to express their own opinions or talk about themselves. This behaviour can border on a compulsion, cowing others into silence. Narcissists tend to ignore others and steer conversations back to their own narratives.
Narcissists want to be the centre of attention:
A narcissist will disregard the need for others to be seen and heard because the narcissist always wants to be the centre of attention.
This is because the narcissist has:
- An excessive need for praise
- A huge sense of entitlement
- A lack of empathy
Leaving a personal or business relationship with a narcissistic person
The best thing to do is to accept that a narcissist won’t ever change, and so, when you’re ready, simply END THE ASSOCIATION OR RELATIONSHIP with them.
Making threats will only forewarn the narcissist and enable them to make your departure more difficult.
Don’t make threats hoping they will repent and reform.
They will not.
Be ready to retake control of your own life.
Just get out of there…
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